holidays are here and presents are wrapped... am I forgetting something?

Hello people of the blogger world! it has been an awefully long time since i have blogged. last night i was watching Julie & Julia and it inspired me to to do a blog entry. so i really don't have much to say... its only when i really have a lot to vomit up that i do come to write an entry. well i can tell u that i am unemployed at the moment... it sucks yes but at the same time i get holidays!! its fabulous not having to ask for time off or anything altho i'd really love to be getting money to put in my bank account. as of now i'd say i have about $6500 in my bank account. this is to be put towards a car. i have been looking on craigslist for cars and for a job. i'm not coming up w/ much luck right now as the job market has gone down since the holidays started to come. i've sent out many resumes i feel like they're being pulled out of my butt. i'm really starting to worry tho as january approaches and i'm still unemployed. oh well i have a cell phone now and that was another thing on my to do list that i have crossed off. don't be texting me like crazy tho b/c i have the fav five plan and my fav five is pretty much my family. so every time u might text me it will cost me 15 cents. i'm so excited for christmas!! its going to be so much fun but lets not forget what it is all about. the kids at church did their little christmas pageant today. it was really cute. joseph was supposed to move but he wasnt so an angel grabbed him and moved him onto the stage... sooooo cute! its amazing how they have the exact same costumes that they did when i was a kid performing the Christmas pageant. i think everyone had a good laugh. lately i have been going to Bethel instead of my regular church (i went to my regular church today). Bethel is just so welcoming and people just have open arms to u. i can definitely say i feel at home there. i also have friends there to keep me company which is nice to know a few people and not be completely alone. anyway we were supposed to go to my grandparents for christmas but we decided not to b/c not everyone could get time off. so we're just having Christmas w/ the fam. it will be just as exciting! so now i've lost my train of thought. so i am signing off... and God bless everyone!! Toodles!

Ah the beautiful wood nymphs!

HELLO.... what is up my fellow bloggers? i have been neglecting my blogging duties and i apologize. except i did have that short rant about being awake at 2am but i removed it b/c it was quite pointless and irrational of me. so tanya and i hung out... it was awesome. i was texting w/ her bf justin about vamps. she got a little jealous. we had a grand old time talking about Eduardo... my fantasy man. too bad i haven't found him yet... he is somewhere out there. anywho... that was just a short/quick update on what i've been up to and i will be attending the Schools for Schools benefit concert!! super stoked for that!! anyway... TOODLES!!

the pioneers would freeze here too...

IT'S FREAKING COLD IN THIS HOUSE!!!!

yes my emotions r running high and they come and go as they please and i'm ready to just through myself on the ground and make it all stop!

BLAH!

hair today, gone tomorrow...

Here is me with short hair as i promised... it is not the most flattering picture as when i photograph myself it never turns out the best. its just so u can see my hair tho so no biggy. TaDa!

word vomit.

urge to blog... i can't help this urge but i've had many urges these past few days. i just have no idea where my life is headed but its ok. its just hard seeing everyone else move forward when i've moved next to nowhere. why can't life be a fairytale? where u get everything u ever dreamed of including the perfect guy. its hard to wait for things to fall into place and its difficult when people keep pushing u and pushing u somewhere u don't want to go. i just kind of wish that sometimes i would be on my own where no one is there to push me but myself. i need my best friend back... i'm just not good at confrontations. life was great till it fell apart. now i feel like i can't put the pieces back together. life stinks...

drastic times call for drastic measures...

i thought i should say HELLO... there is not much to say except my hair has been chopped off. thats right 14 inches of my hair gone! so in other words i've lost 5 pounds. it feels rather liberating since my hair has been long for as long as i can remember. now it is as short as i've ever had it. its perfect too b/c i wake up in the morning and i don't have to do anything... just pin it so its out of my face and voila! i will post pictures sometime... not now... i'm too lazy atm. thats my story... toodaloo!!

Zoo, School, LWW & ladies auction

well i went to the zoo the other day and it was super awesome b/c the last time i was there was when i was 11... i think. the animals loved us until we started taking too many pictures of them. i also went down the big snake slide and it was uber exciting!!

i went back to school!! well high school that is... i got to see the majority of my friends there... if i missed u i'm sorry i had a limited amount of time. then i sat in for a while at the LWW official first rehearsal!! i got introduced and i felt so special like i was a legend! i so wish i was in that play.... of course they wait till i'm out of school to do a cool/fun/fantastice/amazing play:P i loved seeing everyone again it made me so happy and giddy inside!! it was like old times. i also got my yearbook.... nough said.

courtney, maddi, kaitlyn and i went to a ladies auction and i got a super cute dress for $4!!! and a super cute belt for $2!!!! i just had an awesome day on tuesday... i wish it could've been longer:(

atm i'm waiting for all my files to download onto and external hard drive so i can transfer them all onto my computer that i now have in my room! no internet tho... not allowed... altho its understandable.

Toodles!!

09.09.09

this date will not happen for another century!! it should be slightly acknowledged b/c in our lifetimes we will never experience the day of 09.09.09 again. enjoy it for what it is. another positive note is that you who are in school you are half way done your first week of school! take a moment... (breath in.... and breath out) how do you feel? hopefully the second half of your week at school will be awesome! Love to all on this day of 09.09.09 <3

Official first day not having a first day...

school is out for a while for me... we'll see how life goes... i'm pretty satisfied that i'm out of high school. you think the drama of high school leaves after you graduate but it actually follows you wherever you go. there is no avoiding the drama. as long as you have your friends tho everything will be fine. school was a safe space but now that i'm out its not too sheltered anymore. i can go about doing whatever i set my mind to and i don't have to follow a dress code of no shoulders should be showing. i wish you all the very best on your high school endeavors... don't be a stranger and hug your friends every day. hold on to what is left of school b/c you may never see some of these people ever again. wow i'm making this a little depressing but all i'm saying is enjoy it while it lasts and live every moment for Him. i can't wait to see you all on the stage or behind it!! so long. farewell...

It's Only Life

life is complicated... theres no end to the confusion... its all meaningless... at the same time it means everything to you... life is short... some days are good... some days are bad... sometimes you want to curl up into a ball and die... sometimes you're on cloud 9... sometimes all you can do is hope... have faith... and pray.

Then the sun began to rain...

here are some memories from our Manning camping trip. we did a hike that was all nice and downhill and then on the way back not so nice. it was uphill and i bet u can imagine my surprise when i see rebecca prins and andrew martin coming from the other direction. i had to do a double take b/c of all the places to see people from school i saw them in Manning. anyways there are lots of pictures w/ baby Chloe but she is just so darn cute i can't help it! the ground squirrels were very friendly and one was pretty close to climbing all the way into my hand. the ground squirrel in the picture we named Morris. there was also Fiona and Larry. Larry had a bald patch on his head and Morris was fat and Fiona was just skinny so thats how we told them apart. i'll tell u one thing tho that Chloe the baby has the same smile as her Auntie Chelsea in the picture! thats about it for now... we'll see if i decide to post more later. Adios amigos!

Gone in the morning...

its been a while... i know i say that a lot. its nice to know that i always have this outlet when i need it. i hope all ur summers r going great. i had the day off today and it was great just to relax. yes i did a few dishes and thats about it but i really enjoy just doing nothing from time to time. it seem like every day off i have something planned and when i finally get a day off w/ no plans its just nice and relaxing. i would've done something more productive today but i really didn't feel all too productive. now i'm listening to music and downloading pics onto the computer. life is great. i hope things continue the way they r going. there are some things i'm concerned about but it feels like i don't really need to be worried... its not my life so i should stay out of it right? anywho its been an awesome day and i need to go to bed soon! toodles!

Road trip anyone??

well lets just say we didn't end up going camping this long weekend. i'm not going to get into any more detail than that. still we had to go all the way 45 minutes past merrit to get our trailer b/c we're going to manning to camp. so my dad and i went all the way there... spent about 10 minutes enjoying the perfect weather and hooking up the trailer. then we left w/ heavy sighs ecetera. so that 7 or 8 hour day was some good father/daughter bonding time... we talked a lot which we don't always get to do b/c we're always both so tired after a hard day at work. then on sunday my dad and i decided to go on another road trip on the motor bike. we went to Hell's Gate which is about 45 minutes from Spences Bridge if u know where that is or it is 1 and 1/2 hours away from merrit. Hell's Gate was pretty sweet and i took too many pictures b/c i just love my camera soo soo soo much! anywho then we went to Spences Bridge and saw people rafting w/ kumsheen and i so wished i was in one of those rafts w/ them. we waved and they waved back joyfully. then just past spences bridge we stopped for lunch at a little roadside diner (the kind u generally only see in movies) called Rumors. i thought it was a little ironic since i've read a book called rumors but life is generally full of ironies. the only thing about riding on the motorbike is that no matter what i can't hear the music. only when we slow down a bit can i hear and bit of a song and determine which song it is and sing along as i know the words... sometimes i think i got the wrong song but i don't think my dad noticed as when ur going 110 km/hr the wind muffles every bit of noise. we also saw a helicopter w/ a thing of water which we assumed was for a forest fire. we did see smoke but for all we knew it was from somewhere else which we did not know about. when we got home we found out the fire was in Lilloet so that explained it. overall the weekend was good bonding even tho there was not much talking on the bike. i think i can safely say i got a lot of time to think about things even tho there was someone w/ me. i thought about many happy things including my happy dream i had the night b/4. essentially i think we were on the road for another 7 hours. anywho monday was a lazy day... i slept in and we had a bacon, eggs and hashbrown breakfast and it was awesome!! i loved every bit of it. so thats my weekend in a nutshell. today at work was great... time went by quickly and one of my fav people was back so we got to joke around and have dance parties in the kitchen. it was great! thats about it i think and i'm pretty sure this is the longest ramble i have done on my blog ever so this is an important blog. here are some pics!!

we went through a billion tunnels and i held my breath through all of them... it was awesome!! the big chair at the bottom of hell's gate was huge... or ma/b we just shrunk but it is very rare to find a single person seat that fits both my dad and i. until next time! au revoir!

Sleep : the horizontal alignment of your body usually during the night.

well i can say i've been sleeping like a baby even in this heat. its been really nice to have a full night of rest w/o any disturbances. i've had no haunting dreams dreams which is a relief and nothing has woken me up. once i'm asleep i'm asleep. tho i don't want to jinx this and have a bad nights sleep tonight. wait... why am i up at 6:30am... b/c i have to work at 7am. sounds crazy doesn't it... its not that bad. i'm used to working full time now so the sacrifices i have to make aren't that difficult... altho i hate giving up sleeping time. anywho i'm going camping this weekend and lots of sleep comes w/ that so its all good. have a good weekend everyone! i miss u all! adios!

I just don't listen to you!

note: i changed the template again... its just so fun!!

theres is so much to behold in the blogger realm i want to experience it all.

Frolicking to the edge...

BLAAAHHHHH! i had to say it... it is blah... humid... i'm desperate for school... i miss it... i'd rather be there than working... the people i work w/ r great but work itself sucks. a while ago i was annoyed w/ people not emailing back well this person that didn't email me back has now facebooked me!! yay!! they took initiative and that makes me happy!! so we have been corresponding diligently. thats a plus... i can't wait till i can just get oout in the world... it will be great. i'm really having a random ramble about my life so ya... nothing really flows into the next but thats the way life goes too so ya. hopefully i didn't wait too long to write another blog i just haven't really been in the mood... to tell u the truth i'm still not really in the mood but whatever. i've got to keep up appearances. i'm sweating like a banchi right now... its not the most comfortable. anyways ya... story of my life. melly clistmas!

What?!?! I don't get it...

well i really don't have anything different to say except that my bosses are completely retarded. They have no idea what they r doing... they are making my life more difficult than it has to be. i ask for a shift to be changed to an earlier shift and they gladly oblige by changing the wrong freakin shift!! its not rocket science... it doesn't take the smartest person in the world to figure it out. they've just messed w/ me too much and i really need a new job. altho i did get a raise b/c i asked for it. they told me i wasn't being paid as much b/c i didn't have food safe. i was like i have food safe u numb nuts and i brought my certificate on orientation night. they acted w/ shock and surprise so they said they'd give me a raise. they are completely clueless and w/o a doubt crazy people who can't put things together in their heads. they need two heads together to decide on anything. trust me putting two numb nuts heads together won't help much. anywho thats my frustration. other than that i had a great day off work! :D

Superbness!

i know i said that i would have a long ramble but
u know u really have to be in the mood for a ramble and i'm not so here is a picture ramble instead.

Maddi the Muslim.

Lee on her b-day!

Attractive Rachy-poo!

The cutest calf ever!! all brown except for some white under his chin.

Robert the Bride!

so these are my feet on vacation!! yes i washed them down by the lake.

This is my mom... this shot was inspired by Adele VanWyk!

This is Aria... she is Mrs. Jarvis' daughter.

We have s'more T-shirts!! They are the best ever! altho i must admit i admire Tanya's shirt more than mine.

Here is the loverly SB! She is one of my favs! this is a priceless shot!

'Twas the night before work...

hi! i figure i should post every now and then... its hard tho when u lead the working life i lead. i work like 6 days a week and i really don't think i'm getting paid enough. i hate it... i want out. i love all the people there but i just really need to get out of this comfort zone. anywho not much has happened since i graduated... Reb and i were reminicing about high school already yesterday at work... twas fun! i love reminicing<3 anywho like i said i work a lot and i start tomorrow at 7:30 :P i know its early but then i get off earlier. love to all <3 i think i need to have a rather lengthy post at some point when i have time to ramble on and on about nothing really. nighty night!

Duct tape can fix anything...

so my day was pretty boring at work... i sat in the gator all day. well not all day i did walk around quite a bit. while i was sitting in the gator tho i entertained myself by playing w/ the tape that was there. i made bracelets, i made a flower and did pretty much whatever i wanted to w/ it. its amazing how not entertained i was... the only entertaining thing all day were the kids that came to pick berries. some of the little boys liked the gator so i let them sit in it. btw the gator is not an alligator. it is a machine much like a quad but has a small truck bed in the back and it has two seats in the front. so i did not let the children sit on an alligator if thats what you were thinking. anywho i need to go get some warm dinner to eat b/c i'm freezing just like i have been all day. Toodles!

Ta Da!!

I'm back!! I'll post more later when i'm not getting ready to go to work. love to all!!

Oh my! Is it that time of year already?!

HAPPY CANADA DAY!!

Bimetallist: (noun) An advocate of bimetallism.

well its been a while since i last posted... i thought i should post something b/4 i leave for 5 days. i'm going camping at Glimpse Lake... its like 45 minutes east of Merrit. i'm so stoked... its my first vacay as a graduate... i feel so free! i can't wait to just relax, go for walks, play games, eat and best of all sleep. right now tho it just feels like i'm on a regular summer vacay... it doesn't seem much different but come september when i don't need to buy new clothes or school supplies its going to be weird. anywho i love you all and i need to finish up packing a few last minute items. i also need to have a shower b/4 i leave... hopefully i'll be able to get clean up there as well. Toodles ladies and gents (mostly ladies)!

The sky has seized its perspiring... for now

hopefully the weather holds up... at the moment its just windy. its actually not that cold outside... i went out there in my bare feet and it was quite refreshing. well all i need now is hair and make-up. i'm so excited i can't hold it in very well... i was excited last night but i calmed myself down b/4 i went to sleep otherwise i wouldn't be very happy this morning. i also slept in quite a bit b/c i am going to be up all night tonight... i'm bound to get tired at some point. it is going to be super fun and exciting!! i can't believe its finally here!!! my dress has been in my closet for 4 or 5 months and i can finally wear it!! anywho i must eat b/4 my stomach eats out all my insides! Farewell my good friends!

Rain...

... 'nough said.

The Graduate

Here is a picture of the graduate from the class of 2009!

It is just so surreal and it hasn't sunk in yet. Tomorrow this graduate is going to the Otter Co-op in pursuit of a new job. Krause is a good job but i need to get out into the real world where the line-ups do end eventually. I am hoping and praying things in graduated life goes well and is not too crazy for me. Oh! and today this graduate got to things that she wasn't able to finish b/4 b/c she was too busy with school! Ahhh... life is good!

now that i look at this picture more closely it looks kind of cheesy... oh well... thats how i roll.

Is it cumpulsory?

i just wanted to take a moment and say i'm finished high school completely and forever!! i never have to go back unless by choice! so exciting! so yesterday after our bio exam courtney and i went to her house and did yoga AND pilates. then we went to my house and swam... twas fun. i haven't gone swimming in my pool in ages! then Maddi called us up and asked if we would like to go see year one w/ her. of course we said yes. we got out of the pool got ready went to courtney's place to get her some different clothes and went to the movie. it was hilarious... i don't remember the last time i laughed that hard at a movie. anywho we had an awesome out of school celebration! i can't wait to see whats going to happen the rest of my life! Austa Lavista Baby!

War Drobe, Spare Oom

i'm so bagged right now... i can't think straight on anything. math studying is like the hardest thing ever! i hope i'm able to do well on this exam. biology i'm not too worried about except for the digestion unit... that one was kind of confusing and jumbled all over the place. too many enzymes to remember and where they are made and where they are secreted. funny thing when i was pouring through my history review (from Sylvia) the other day. Sylvia wrote Gestapo as secrete police... it made me laugh... she did it again on the Hoare-Laval pact too. it made me laugh. anywho i know i was going to go to LWW (Lion the witch and the wardrobe) tonight but i totally forgot about it so i didn't really have time to prepare and dinner wasn't ready until like 6pm so i kinda didn't have time. i know i'm making excuses but i'm sure those that went will understand. life is chaos.

roses are red
violets are blue
I'm sorry
I didn't go with you

hopefully that poem makes up for the wonderful time i missed at LWW. i made the poem myself... i think its rather original! anyway... thats my rant for today!! toodles!

PS Kirstie if you are reading this post scroll down and see an earlier post that wasn't there b/4... i made it just for you!!

Stressing? Me? No...

who is going to almost fail history today?? ME!! i know its not really something to be proud of... i actually am pretty confident going into it but knowing Mr. Moes don't count on it being easy. so i am in my comfy yoga pants, some fuzzy socks, a comfy shirt and my comfy krause hoodie! i'm all set comfort wise so i hope i'm all set knowledge wise. i studied for about 4 hours yesterday and i don't know if thats enough. i've been praying that i retain all the info that i've stuck in my head throughout the year altho most of it went in through one ear and out the other. hopefully i have enough common knowledge to get me through this today. Anywho i'll probs see most of you there... good luck to all on exams (that they may not be prepared for)!! Toodles!!

Just for my baby girl!

Here is a picture of the bee in colour just for my baby girl Kirstie!!

It's official!

I AM A GRADUATE FROM LANGLEY CHRISTIAN HIGH SCHOOL!!

Although i still have exams but who cares i already got my diploma!!

Reality

I'M GRADUATING TODAY!!

no joke i really am and i'm so excited but sad at the same time. its going to be so freakin amazing and i can't wait to be walking (or tripping and falling) across that stage tonight. Tis going to be a blast. it has been a long 13 years at LCS but it has finally reached the end.

I'll be seeing you!

A Dream Within A Dream...

i got really excited so i started taking pictures of random things... here are a few.

Kobe...

Yes these are cloth diapers.


Higher power?

There's a bee!

Green-eyed wonder.


Rustic?

XOXO... Gossip Girl

AHH! i had fun tonight... lots of laughs and randomness and gossip. i love gossip as much as i hate it but its really entertaining sometimes. anywho it was fun and i want to go read my book... nighty night... Tootaloo!

BURST!

AH!! its like summer! i'm graduating! i know what the school play is next year! my sis and i have made our own playlist for the summer! my hair is straight! AH!!

Emily! Walk simply. Who do you think you are today?

GAHH!! man sometimes you can tell who you real friends r... i can see it now. i'm also very offended by my cousin who is really immature and retarded. shes been a spoiled brat all her life so i really don't care what she says but it still urks me. i just want to slap her face and give her a reality check. i don't even care if she reads this blog b/c ma/b it will be the reality check she needs. my friend... all the conversation she can come up w/ now is saying that part of my outfit is nice. i really don't think its sincere its just to break the awkward silence. i'm just P.O. BLAH!! goodnight fellow bloggers of the world!

Don't leave!! It's still Sheila's blog just a different template!!

well i decided to change the template of my blog b/c i like to switch it up a bit. i like when things change just a little bit... if things change drastically then i have i hard time w/ that. little change is good. hopefully you all like it b/c i like it and i won't be changing it for a while. anywho loves to all who read this. tootaloo!

I have almost reached an impass...

well heres my first post in June of 2009... i'm on the home-stretch. pretty soon i'll be graduated and not have to worry about school for a while. anywho its time for bed. nighty nights!

"How can I be a father when I'm moving in the other direction?"

"You can be as mad as a mad dog at the way things went. You can swear and curse the fates; but when it comes to the end, you have to let go."--Benjamin Button
you do have to let go... how r u supposed to move on when u hold on to something that has ran its course? you can't dwell on one thing forever... you're wasting time and effort and mind power. whats the use in holding onto the past when the future is here and now and we move forward not backward. i don't understand how it works. all i know is friendship is something that shouldn't be broken and shouldn't be able to be broken. one minute everything was fine and the next it all came crashing down to a halt. where does it go from there?

Walking by with a friendly smile turns out to be more difficult than I realized.

so i'm still waiting on an email... someone has yet to reply. i even sent a second one, it seems a little desperate but i crave emails. i also really love real mail when its not a bill ect... well and i have this scared feeling and i can't really explain it... not on here at least. i just have a lot of things on my mind that won't go away and i'd like get past them. well i know i don't have a lot to say considering i haven't been on here in three days but not much else has happened. anywho have an awesome weekend... tootles!

Greatness...

well today is full of quizzes ect... ect... and i haven't really studied all that much b/c i went to the Great Escape last night. it was sweet!! i played lazer tag for the first time ever! anywho just wanted to say HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO JANNA AND THEORON!! its exciting having a birthday... anywho i'm off. Chow!

Just a bit of typing... that's all it takes.

well i'm annoyed at people who don't email back and you know they've been on the internet b/c you've seen their status change on FB. it bugs the heck out of me... why can't people just email back or ma/b they just never got the email in the first place. i just hate it tho b/c i almost always reply right away and if not right away the next day. i wish i could just get emails back b/c i don't like getting spam and stuff... it doesn't make me feel needed. getting an email from a friend or someone i really care about makes me feel needed. bah! i know my blog seems to always be about me but this is my blog and i can write pretty much w/e i want right?? anywho thats my morning frustration! Adios Amigos!

Echo-o-o-o-o...

everyone leaves... they come back for a little while then they leave again :( it is very upsetting. all the grade 10's r in Capernwray right now... so not fair. those people who were on the band trip not too long ago may have some troubles keeping up but whatever. our school has just been very empty lately and i don't like it. i'm also concerned about a a couple people who have not been doing well lately. hopefully they're ok. its really worrying me tho. anywho i can't wait till people come back the school is so quiet w/o them :(

Waffles!

well its early morning... it smells like waffles!! it's defs a good smell and i appreciate it. appreciating the small things in life is what keeps me in good spirits. all i have to do is look back at all the good times i've had and appreciate them while i remember them. it has been such a long long road getting to this point and trying to comprehend what other people r thinking or what is going on in their lives. sometimes its just hard to guess anymore when you don't know them like u once did. losing friends is the hardest part... i hate the feeling of them gone b/c they left a hole w/ nothing to fill it. not trying to make them feel guilty or anything. i don't even think one of them really realizes what they have done to offend me. that person is oblivious to the real world... so superficial. anyways this is my morning rant... don't worry i'm doing fine i just like to blog my minds thoughts. this is my online journal! see some of you soon!! Tootaloo!

People, Places, Things

everything is a reminder
it's always there
even a hint
no matter where you go
the reminders are there
you try so hard to forget
which makes the reminders
so hard to avoid
almost like a reoccuring dream
the film keeps rolling in your mind
theres no escape
theres no where to hide

Twas a long day...

today has been an okay day... school was boring. after that i went to MTF w/ my maja and then we went home. at 5pm i went down for a nap which was needed majorly. i was woken up at 8:30pm so i could eat some dinner. i had a wonderfully juicy hamburger. Kris won American Idol thank God. really i don't see Adam going far in the singing business unless he finds a good band to back him up... what can i say he blended in pretty well w/ Kiss. anywho my whole body is aching from the waterslides but it was so worth it! love you all... good night, sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite!

I'm going to let it slide...

so we had major fun!! we went to cultus lake waterslides... for FREE!! and we got free food as well.... it was simply amazing!! i had tons of fun... it was a first for me being at the waterslides. i thoroughly enjoyed myself and i'm very sore and my shoulders r red as i discovered when i was getting ready for my shower. i also have more freckles on my nose and cheeks according to my sis. it was a successful skip day i must say. Mrs. Shelvey let her math class on the roof when we did our victory laps around the parking lot. Twas a sweet and satisfying day! Tootaloo!!

Lou lou skip to my lou...

well i hope y'all have fun in school today b/c... its grad skip day!!! oh the wonders... thank God that the weather is relatively sunny. we're off to the beach... not to brag or anything. i hope you guys enjoy your day w/o the grade 12's!! you're already at school so you'll get this after u realize that we're gone. love you all!! have fun!!

Craving!

chocolate time!! in need of major chocolate... i've got my whoppers here and nothing to hide. just me and my chocolate watching a movie :D

What a beautiful day in the neighbourhood...

THEY'RE COMING HOME TODAY!!!

IT'S MY SISTERS B-DAY TODAY!!!

Each Step

facing tomorrow
putting on a smile
living as usual
missing the big picture
following in the dark
loving life
but dreading every minute
one step at a time
we learn to cope
there is a purpose
wait for it
find comfort in the unknown
stop worrying about the future
it will come
one day at a time

Gone

its been a long road
travelling on like theres nothing wrong
denying the inevitable
my heart keeps beating
my mind knows better
driven by emotions
through the endless drought
no end in sight
just a vast expanse of nothing
its been a long road
travelling on like theres nothing wrong

Breath -- Yode-Hey-Vah-Hey

its time to let go
time to let everything take its course
its time to live and laugh and love again
time to be yourself
time to follow your heart and dreams
its time to revel in your thoughts
time to walk with Him
its time to be a child
time to follow in His love
time to live your life
its time to realize what you have
time to give your all
its time for you to fall

What???

well its almost friday!!!!!!!!! so exciting... i love fridays. altho there is no chapel tomorrow but thats all i know. there was a big long announcement last block today and i couldn't understand any of it besides there is no chapel. thats kind of a bumber... chapel is when i get to slee-- i mean listen to the amazing speakers that come to our school. oh well i'll still enjoy my wonderful friday as it is just one more day till the long weekend. happy sleeping!!

This week = pretty boring + randomness

i'm really missing the choir/band people... its too quiet w/o them. i'm really tired too... this weekend is a long awaited weekend in which there will be lots of sleep. this week actually hasn't been too bad but it is a little agonizing doing pointless boring work. anyways i miss them lots and i wish they were here. i've been documenting things that have been happening this week w/o them... its pretty funny if you get some of the inside jokes ect... anyways it shall be fun to read over and see how bored we actually were this entire week. Austo Lowego (see you later!)

BAM!!

LOST! so intense... i'm pretty sure i know whats going to happen tho i just have to wait like another 9 months ma/b... it always seems to start in february. or ma/b 5 months and it'll start in october... i can't wait. its going to be agonizing! good night y'all!

Do not aggravate the sleeping lion!

well i asked my mom if i could have a mental health day today... she said she'd think about it and then when i asked later she said no. i set myself up for disappointment. i wish i could've b/c i have slept in, in like two weeks and i need that time to sleep in... thats what keeps me functioning and what keeps me from falling asleep in class. at least Mr. Moes was too enthraled w/ what he was doing to even notice. anywho i'm really looking forward to this looooonnnngggggg weekend. it'll be nice to sleep half the days away again. so i'm awake (only slightly) and i'm all ready to go to school which is going to be pretty pointless. tootaloo!!

BINGO!!

we played bingo at the renaissance old folks home. it was lots of fun!! i sat by Mary and she was very proud that i voted in the election. i definitely wore my sticker just to show off a bit... it was pretty awesome. well the last round of bingo we were going for the blackout... and for once i won!! although there were no prizes or anything but i loved the satisfaction of winning b/c the people around me had more than one bingo card and i only had one. i beat them w/ my one bingo card. it was a sweet victory. anywho i'm tired... time for beddy-bye. cyber hugs go out to everyone!!

The week they left...

i fell asleep in history class today... yes i must say it was the very first time i have actually genuinely fell asleep in class. we were only watching a movie so it was not a huge deal and there were only 7 of us there. oh and i got beat up today... not in the literal sense but it was supposed to look real... Mrs. Jarvis had way too much fun bruising me. anywho not much else to say... have a wonderful good evening!

Children, time to get up! I don't want to call you again.

well i have many frustrations and i just want to scream as if letting them all go. i need a mental health day.

Get 'er done!

school is a joke... there is no one there and nothing important to do. we should all just have the week off. technically i could've skipped this whole week b/c i was on mr. A's absent list for the trip. if i'd known that then i would've skipped. oh well... it was a tiring day i must say. doing nothing really wears you out. i hope we don't do anything important in history tomorrow... theres only like 4 of us so its kind of pointless to move on. this whole week is going to be a big joke. i can't wait for it to be over. anywho tis my story for the day... not very exciting i know. toodles!!

Fortunately I don't know what a bimetallist is...

so this weekend was completely full for me. it was awesome tho... i thoroughly enjoyed this weekend... it seemed to last a long time. i can't wait for next weekend!! i love long weekends they make me super happy!! i'll get to sleep in a lot which i didn't get to do much of this weekend. i had fun at the spring festival on saturday. i was at the jewellery table w/ courtney and maddi. every time someone came to the table they asked if we made the jewellery. it was kind of annoying. this one unfortunate boy bought his mom a rather hideous necklace for mothers day. i think boys should stick to buying flowers for their moms b/c they don't know quite how to pick out jewellery. anywho i'm off for now. love you all and i miss the ones in toronto (*Anna*). Aloha everyone!

There was Emily eating her breakfast, like she's done for 17 years and she's going out of my house.

today has been a successful mothers day... i just wish i was a little more awake. i stayed up to about 1:30am last night. i was up till 12am w/ my mom so that was good mother/daughter time... we just watched a movie but it was good. i would have pictures of mothers day but oh wait i don't have a working camera:P oh well... i can't wait to get my new camera... its going to be awesome. anywho everyone who reads this tell the moms in your household Happy Mothers Day from me!! love you all and i hope you guys had an amazing day!

Bonfire Extravaganza!!

well the grad bonfire was a complete success! i enjoyed myself and i'm glad that i went. the food was exceptionally good too. note to all grad classes bonfires are freakin awesome!! do it!!

Perhaps Mrs. Webb isn't used to callers at 7 in the morning.

it seems that i've been staying up too late lately. i've been reading every night b/4 i go to bed so i stay up late. its not really a good thing since i'm always bagged in the mornings now but its a good thing in that i'm reading. today i have the biology test first thing in the morning... hopefully i do well. i made a review last night so hopefully thats all the information that i needed. i can't wait till i actually wake up this morning tho. i wish i was a morning person but i'm really not. i could say i am but i'd be lying. i don't want to lie. ok now i'm so tired i'm blabbing on about nothing important in particular. anywho thats my morning rant... have a good day all!!

I was ashamed! Such a conversation between the two of them!

well i've got to say i'm disappointed. my boss at Krause has not emailed me back yet since i emailed her saying i needed full time hours otherwise i was going to get another job. i gave my resume to the Co-op about a month ago when they had openings. i keep going there to follow up to see if anything is available but only an accountant and a pharmacist position are available. i'm just getting very frustrated since i can't get the hours i need or get another job. its really disappointing. anywho i got to go finish my Biology bonus work and study for the test. Austo lowego ( i think thats Spanish for see you later... i can't spell words in Spanish as you can see).

Boring people with my predictions...

ok i had another revelation last night... this is my other prediction of LOST. when the hydrogen bomb gets detinated everyone is going to die but the people who r from the future will flash back to the present (which is 2007 in the show). i think its a pretty good prediction i must say. anyways... well i had dinner over at Travis and Rosie's last night b/c i was the only one at my house. we had tacos and they were amazing i must say. i got to spend time w/ Spence and my little peanut (Chloe). it was good. anywho i think i've bored everyone w/ my talk of LOST and again i'm sorry if you don't watch it. its my fav show of all times so i can't not talk about it. ok enough blogging for this morning. off to school i go:P

The Finale!

well LOST is just one of the craziest shows ever! i love it tho... it makes me so happy but at the same time so frustrated when it stops w/ a cliff hanger at the end of each episode. i think they are all going to die in some way shape or form... how else can u end it off? but the season finale is next week and it looks pretty intense. all the people are crazy too... w/ everything they've gone through they'll believe just about anything. richard is the constant... he never changes whatsoever. he either is part of the island, he is jacob or he is travelling through time all the time. i dunno its complete craziness. for those of you who don't watch i'm sorry b/c you won't understand any of this. anywho i'm excited for the finale!! but sad at the same time b/c it'll be over. anywho i'm writing too many blogs in a day but i'm trying to make up for the week that i lost. time to hit the hay... good night all!! sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite!!

With great power comes great responsibility.

so i had a pretty decent day today... it was long and i had to endure most of it but all in all it was good. i've decided i'm going to print a picture of myself and stick it on a stick and send it with tanya on the choir/band trip. they will be able to take pictures w/ it and it will be like i was really there... jk (it won't be the same when the cardboard cut out can't speak). i think it will be great fun next week w/ half the school gone. i'm so excited... i think i might take a mental health day since there won't be too much to do during the week. we'll see how it goes. oh its my parents 31st anniversary today so they're going out for dinner! so cute. and my dad already brought her flowers at work! its also my dogs b-day... he is 7 years old. so many good things! anywho time for me to get off the computer... i don't know how i survived w/o it. au revoir mes amis!!

Where did you come from? You don't belong to me!

HALLELUJAH! T-plans r done, over with, finito... absolutely 100% finished. so freakin exciting... now its off my shoulders once and for all. i think i may have done my monologue better tonight then i did for the actual performances. everything worked perfectly and i'm glad i had plan B b/c plan A did not want to work. thanks mom for plan B. i'm so relieved and relaxed right now and i thoroughly enjoyed my shower. next week i hope to take a mental health day b/c the band/choir people r gone so there won't be much to do. too bad i'm in choir but i'm not going to its all good... i know i'll miss a lot but i know we're going to have tonnes of fun here as well. well its a good night and i think i may straighten my hair... quite possibly... don't know for sure. well everyones sleeping in Grovers Corners. you get a good rest too now. Goonight!

There they come...

so really nervous about tonight but i think i'll do ok... i'm excited too... but more nervous. i think i may be twitching a lot or just moving a lot... i can't really sit still at this point. i'm really hoping i get a good mark on this... i need to get changed out of my regular clothes and into something i bit more fancy. i've seen a part of Maddi's already and its really good... probably better than mine but oh well. i can't wait to see Thomas' fifteen year plan... i've never planned that far ahead b/4.... i like to take life one day at a time. oh and i get Mrs. Jarvis as one of my markers tonight!! i thought that was a big score on my part. i also have Mr. DeGroot... he's pretty cool. i had to spend a whole week w/ him in toronto so he better give me a good mark. haha jk. i'm making really lame jokes b/c i'm so freakin nervous. hopefully all goes well and goes as planned. anywho i need to get ready! tootaloo!!

Oh! Good morning George. Goodness! You frightened me!

its a new morning and i'm feeling kind of crappy still... i had a nap yesterday which helped a bit but it was only for like an hour. i'm really kind of nervous and frustrated b/c T-plans r tonight... hopefully i do well. i just need to speak up. i think i'm going to do my monologue from the play at the very beginning to set the tone for the whole thing and to take up some time. i can't wait to get it done and over w/... it will be a great accomplishment. Good morning all!!

I'm back!!

i finally have my internet back!! so exciting!! i've been wanting to blog and i haven't been able to... such a sad story. well i had one of the most amazing weekends i've had in a long time. friday was just an amazing day all around b/c i was just in such a good chipper mood. i babysat on friday... Spencer was an angel... chloe on the other hand wouldn't shut up. i love her but at that point in time i wasn't too happy w/ her. it all worked out tho. saturday chels and i went down to the states to shop!! i found earrings for grad that were normally $55 but i got them for $11!!! i know its insane!! then i spent about $33 dollars at bath and body works but it was so worth it... they had sales that i just could not pass up. we got chocolate milk from Edaileen dairy... so good!! then i had the amazing cast party saturday night!! moustache mania!! it was awesome... i quite enjoyed myself. Sunday i was the only one from my family that went to church b/c mom and dad went camping this past weekend. i finished filming for my drama project! today was the downfall after a great weekend... what goes up must come down. so today sucked but i look back on this weekend and it makes me happy! cheerio!

Well I still get that tickling feeling in my throat.

well last night was almost successful... i won't be using my dads laptop b/c it has a virus but i have a USB stick!! yay!! hopefully it works on the computer at school and everyone can see it. i'm praying the movie works on the computer too b/c it works on this computer but not on my dad's laptop. i'm just praying everything works like it should. tonight is the Spling Fling ( i spelt it wrong on purpose). i'm so excited! i'm going to courtney's house to get ready then afterwards we're sleeping over at leanne's!! so stoked... its going to be amazing. anywho this is my blog entry for the day b/c i won't get around a computer unless its for my T-plan. cheerio darlings!

Well George Gibbs certainly let himself have a real conversation now didn't he?

can it really get anymore difficult?? well i guess i'm done my powerpoint but its still only 9 minutes (exactly). that means i have like 6 more minutes of nothingness that i need to fill in... what the heck am i supposed to do?!?! oh well... its just the homeroom presentation... the next presentation is way more important b/c its worth 80 marks... this one is only 20 marks. still important but not that important. i just want to thank Kirstie personally b/c every time i'm having a bad day or something is really frustrating like this T-plan she always makes me feel better w/ her encouraging comments. i do appreciate all comments tho not just kirtie's comments. i just love my daughter that much! and i realize how ridiculous it is that i use play lines for the titles of my posts but i don't care. i love it! well i'm off for now!

Stringing some beans...

ok its all good now w/ the video that i have made but my whole powerpoint is exactly half the time of how long the T-plan has to be. now i'm trying to figure out what else to add to make it more time... i don't know if the sentence i did just now made sense grammatically but i don't really care. well i'm going to go add some stuff... i don't know what but i'll think of something creative:P

What I mean is, am I pretty?

transition plan is turning out to be a little difficult. i had to take a DVD i have and change it into a different file. its proving to be more tedious than i thought. i just checked it to see if the converter did a good job... it started the movie from the halfway mark:P AHHHHH!! so frustrating... i'm trying it a different way now so hopefully it works. i can't wait to just be done w/ it. tomorrow we're just presenting in front of our homerooms so it shouldn't be too bad... i hope mine is interesting enough that they don't fall asleep. right now i feel like one of those people who when they walk in the room people get up and leave and you think you're the problem. this feeling has nothing to do w/ my T-plan i just thought i'd share what i've been feeling lately. anywho it made me uber happy when people complimented me on my glasses and shoes today... not going to lie i crave attention sometimes. i know its crazy. anyways thats pretty much it. i might keep you up to date on my T-plan depending on how things work out. cheers!

Put your rubbers on!!

today was generally a poopy day. at the end of the day it seemed so much better tho. choir was cancelled due to the absence of Mr. A. i got to read my book until my mom picked me up from school. we went and picked up my new glasses which are amazing!! i'm so excited i'm wearing them tomorrow! then we went to costco and got lots of yummy food! my mom even bought white bread for me... i never get white bread. army & navy were having a shoe sale (danger danger!) i bought two pairs of shoes and they are freakin amazing!! i love them. and for someone who doesn't like pointy shoes i got a pair of black pointy shoes! i know crazy right? i think i'll wear the black ones on friday to the spring fling but tomorrow i'm wearing my red ones. so w/ everything that happened it actually turned out to be an ok day!

As far as that goes, speaking for myself...

well the canucks won... thats awesome. our pastor told us to keep our expectations low and so far its working. hopefully they'll be able to continue on this streak but i'm not keeping my hopes up. i can't wait till this is over. i really am not happy w/ myself... i always do something other than what i need to do for hw and it ends up screwing me up all day. i don't have any idea why i procrastinate its just in me. onto other things i'm still wanting to punch people in the face but not as much... just the slightest urge. anywho i'm just not putting myself in good positions and its making me even more crazy... i hate that i can't just buckle down and do things. oh well i'm sure i'll find a balance. i'm off for another crazy day at school :P see y'all soon. oh and one more thing i almost forgot HAPPY BIRTHDAY COURTNEY!! altho i'm pretty sure she doesn't read my blog but oh well.

You have no right playing here on Main Street!

well youth was good... not the best it could be tho. during worship the people behind me could not stop talking and i almost snapped and told them if they didn't want to worship God to go to another room and talk. but i didn't... i held it in. it was just the most irritating thing i wanted to punch them in their faces!! wow i'm realizing today i've wanted to be really aggressive w/ people... mainly w/ peoples faces. anywho then we went into small groups and that was ok... i just don't feel like i'm getting anything out of youth anymore. its more just a social gathering once a week. ma/b it will get better who knows. anywho i'm off to "bed"(meaning i'm doing the hw i should've finished b/4 youth). here is the pic i promised of my niece Chloe!! shes in the bathtub!

Cheerier thoughts...

well i'll be off to youth in a little while... i have hw for tomorrow but i haven't done it... i've been working on my transition plan. oh how exciting! i'd actually rather do my T plan than do hw that is due the next day its kind of weird. i guess its b/c i'm more excited about the stuff i'm doing after school than what i'm doing in school right now. i'm really fed up w/ school no joke... i'm ready to book it out of this joint and be done w/ it. i can't wait to graduate it will be so amazing... don't worry i will miss a lot of people and i'll come visit. its just the school part that angers me daily. math especially... i have no idea why i took math its not going to help me in life in any way shape or form. oh well i guess its just one more thing i'll have to endure. well i need to be going soon. toodles!!

George! Look sharp!

right now i have the nagging feeling that... oh i don't know how to say it. i just have a nagging feeling right now. i hated my dream i had last night... it was good but bad at the same time. it just made me upset and i wanted to punch someone in the face. i've never actually punched someone in the face. i wonder if it feels good to punch someone in the face. i'd like to punch the people that are so immature and they don't even realize it. thats how i'm feeling right now and i hate that feeling.

Is he sassy to you?

well its going to ba another short post but i figure i can spare a few minutes b/4 i hit the hay. my weekend was awesome and it went by way too quickly. saturday i ate food!! i did the 30 hour famine and my "first" meal was breakfast on saturday. so i had no energy whatsoever but i took care of both my neice and nephew for pretty much the whole day. it was great. my nephew loves his tricycle and he rode it all the way around the small block when i took him for a walk. then i vegged out for the rest of the night. sunday was church then chels mom and i went out to white rock to shop. i got ben & jerry's ice cream (chocolate fudge brownie) it was so good! i finished it off tonight which was pretty much the whole thing. don't judge me!! i went for a walk today so its all good. anywho thats pretty much what i've been up to summed up in a few sentences. i hope y'all are doing well. i'll post some pictures of Chloe in the bath tub!! i can't wait to embarass her when shes older!! good night!

I'm not living in a hole... the internet is back!

i know its been a while but the internet wasn't working... i will give you (meaning my blog readers) an update ASAP!!

Her mom buys the booze for minors, her grandpa steals and she pole dances (well not now)

i'm going to be honest here... i really don't want to go to the arts festival tonight:P i really don't want to perform at all. well thats besides the point.
today was grandparents day at school... courtney and i were adopted by Maddi's grandma and grandpa and grandma and papa. it was great fun... they took us out for lunch and i had chicken souvlaki. it was so delicious! so "my" grandparents are hilarious... papa called me the skinny one and it kind of implied that Maddi and Courtney were fat but of course thats not true. when we got back to school Maddi got out of the car and she lost the flip flop on her good foot... it made me laugh so hard. shes getting better w/ those cruches (sorry if its spelt wrong). we missed all of history which rocked. so this week has been pretty laid back... i'm just not excited for this arts festival. hopefully i'll have lots of fun tho anyways. hope to see you guys there!! (it starts at 6:30 in case you didn't know that already).

Oh look a snail is passing me by...

yesterday had to be one of the slowest days of my life... it was such a mindless day where i literally did nothing. my first class was Bible and we worked on our transition plans... i just checked my email found a couple pics to put in my powerpoint and that was all i could do. all my other pics are on my computer so i couldn't really do anything. next i had spare... i never really do anything in spare. for some reason we were talking about our morning routines and apparently i'm weird for only taking 5 minutes to eat and only 2 minutes to do my makeup. i also ate my lunch in spare b/c i was uber hungry. then lunch rolled around and that was good fun. then i had TA where i collected the recycling, i photocopied one page and then had to cut it all in half and the paper cutter wasn't exactly agreeing w/ me yesterday. then i erased pencil marks from maps that are used by the geo people. then i had math class.... it was a review class. i finished half of my chapter summary and then i didn't want to do anything else so i talked to Maddi and Lizbeth for the rest of class. choir was such a bore... then my mom came and got me early b/c she had a dentist appointment she forgot about so ya. that was my uber long dragged out day that took lots of effort to endure. anywho its time to go... oh theres an fine arts festival tonight if anyone wants to come. bye!

It's cruel I know, but I couldn't get myself to say anything. I went into it as blind as a bat myself.

everything reminds me
theres no escaping it
how can i forget?
its all around
i can't shake that feeling
regret and disappoinment
when will this fade?
its a roller coaster ride
theres ups and downs
wheres the balance?
everything reminds me
theres no escaping it.

Blogging...

wow i was so hyper for a while there... now i'm so exhausted... well i've actually been exhausted all day. now its really time for sleep but i must get clean first!! so today was pretty good not going to lie. i thought it's be a little crappy but i had a few things that made it better and happy. i'm not really specific about anything when it comes to my days and who or what made my day the way it was b/c it is a blog and anyone can read it so i try to be careful. my heart feels like its beating a mile a minute but really its just regular right now. that hazelnut hot smoothie just gave me a boost of energy and now its gone. i'm going to write a short poem and then have a shower and its off to bed for me.

Roses are red
the house is brown
i don't like moths
but i don't frown

this poem may not be 100% true so don't take it literally. i'm pretty sure i frown sometimes... my house is only partially brown and ya... good night y'all!!

Missing...

i'm missing many things... one of which is the play and the cast. i miss the play so much it gave me something to look forward to and dread (yes at the same time) all day. we need to have another cast party pronto b/c i think i'm going through post-play withdrawal. we need to party on a day thats nice and sunny out though b/c if we ever did it on a day like today it would suck but it'd still be fun. i think we should play "honey if you love me" that was truely epic last year. i just miss a lot of people right now... i'm not saying any names in particular but there are many people i wish i could talk to and just reminice w/ them. well i wish a HAPPY EASTER to all of you!!

It was a Good Friday... no pun intended

here are some pictures from our adventures in richmond where we used to live.

to the left is a picture of our old house where i spent the first two years of my life.

Dad's shirt says shut up and fish if you can't read it.

here is Spencer with his daddy... so cute!

this is one of the swans that we saw up close.

here is spencer standing beside raggedy Anne who was flying a small kite.

Come along now, and bring that bowl with you.

i know i'm ridiculous and quoting the play a lot but my lines just coincide w/ my life somehow... ma/b not in the same context but ya. so it is long weekend madness and i'm so excited to sleep in tomorrow!! tomorrow as a family we're going to Gary Point and just hanging out for the day... we will revisit our old house that i don't even remember and we'll watch people fly kites and just have a nice family day. i'm so excited... i almost feel like bringing a picnic. anywho the quote in the title just works b/c well it just makes sense in my head and i can't really explain it in words... but i'm so stoked for tomorrow. i'd like to thank all the people that comment on my blog b/c it makes me so happy!! i'd like to thank SB especially for commenting on pretty much every single one of my posts. oh!! i just remembered that i just watched LOST and it was amazing! i think i'm actually keeping up w/ all the information... i'm really not that confused by anything although some people r stuck in the 50's or 70's and then the rest are in present time like 2009. so ya tis quite weird but i enjoy the complication and figuring out who everyone is and how they've crossed paths b/4. anywho this is just a bit of a rant on nothing and i hope you can tell i'm in a good mood right now... odd but very good at the same time. have a good Easter Weekend everyone!!

this is the easter bunny that we found last year... actually we didn't find him at easter time but just felt like putting a pic of a bunny on here. we actually found this guy in our tractor!

The End of an Era... The Start of Something New

well today has been an eventful day... i'm just glad i got to relax at the end of the day. i got home from choir and just hung out at home. then my sis picked me up and i ran errands w/ her. i bought whoppers!! they are like one of my fav candies of all time... of course they are covered in chocolate b/c thats exactly what i need right now. chocolate is always a good thing. i may have a huge weight that was lifted off my shoulders today and it feels great but i still have that sick feeling in my stomach. its that sick feeling that you can't just shake off and you are hungry but you don't feel like you can eat anything but i force myself to eat otherwise i'm going to be hungry later. anywho i might be in for another restless sleep tonight... ma/b i ought to take some gravol so it won't be so restless. well i stink so i must have a shower as soon as the other person gets out of the shower. goodnight fellow bloggers and blog fans!

Waves of Grace

The walls are high, the walls are strong
I've been locked in this castle
That I've built for far too long
You have surrounded me, a sea on every side
The cracks are forming and I've got nowhere to hide

Now I see
The walls I've built are falling
And your waves of grace are washing over me

My heart's been hard, I have been blind
I have often worked so hard to keep you from my mind
I have ruled my life, in a palace built on sand
I want you to reign, Lord, take me by the hand

Lord please reign in every part
I give my life to you
I open up my heart
I want to be like you, I want to seek your face
O Lord please wash me in your awesome waves of grace

music seems to tell it like it is when you have no clue what's going on. sometimes it can give you peace of mind and sometimes it shows you what you've been blind to all along. music is how i release my emotions and right now this song seems fitting. this is my prayer...

...it'll stunt your growth, that's a fact.

well today didn't get much better... i wish life wasn't so complicated. right now i feel an enormous amount of guilt, regret and disappointment. this is not the way i want to live my life. right now i just need to get past this milestone in my life that is actually blocking the road i'm on that is life. there are some things i can't comprehend or wrap my mind around and it bugs the heck out of me. i've never felt so helpless in my entire life. i don't know whats wrong w/ me or what i'm doing wrong i just can't figure anything out. sometimes i want to wish it all away and start new... start w/ a blank slate but that doesn't always work. life ain't no etch'e'sketch. i know the weather is beautiful and i appreciate it but i find it hard to enjoy when i'm in such a mopey mood. i really just want to ball my eyes out and wish it all away... why is life so freakin difficult sometimes? i don't get it... i try to understand but i can't. i also feel an enormous amount of pressure right now too. i can't function properly and i don't know what i need to do. hopefully tomorrow is a new, brighter and better day.

... I won't have you gobbling like wolves...

i just wanted to express the frustration i'm feeling right now. i'm really frustrated... just w/ myself and some people. i'm frustrated at myself b/c i didn't do my homework. i'm frustrated at some people well b/c i just am... i can't really explain it. a good thing tho my parents r home from mexico. altho they r so loud in the morning that i always wake up like an hour b/4 i need to wake up... thats why they r frustrating me. anyways... thats my shpeel for the morning... i might have some more to write later today but don't get ur hopes up. have a good day everyone who reads this...

Thinking... That's All

so this has been a weird weekend. i've felt so tired all the time and i can't figure out why. ma/b its all the fresh air i've been getting since i've been out in the beautiful weather we've been having. i'm still in a weird funk where i just feel like a let down... i don't know what it is. i seem so out of it and i can't quite put my finger on it. AHA!! i think i... no never mind.... i thought i solved it but no i didn't. i think i need some double stuffed oreos... ma/b that will help. i just wish i were in a better mood right now. i like being in good moods. i think i may be in a good mood tomorrow as i will get to see my favourite (and only) sexy beast. well tomorrow is going to be another day! everyones restin in aldergrove. you get a good rest now too. goodnight!

TODAY!!

ANNA COMES HOME TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SO FREAKIN EXCITING!!!!

it will be the highlight of my day!

exciting news!!

ANNA BANANA/SEXY BEAST IS COMING HOME TOMORROW!!!!!!! I CAN'T WAIT TILL SHE COMES AND I CAN SEE HER EVERY WEEKDAY!! I'M SO FREAKIN' EXCITED!!!! THATS MY STORY FOR TODAY!!

Blah...

today sucks. its april fool's yet there was snow... not cool. now its raining... still not cool. i have to write an enormously long essay... also not cool. anywho i hope your day is going better than mine :P

The end of my last spring break :(

well i figured i haven't written a blog all weekend so i should write one today. theres not much to say except my parents are in mexico for the week so i have the car all to myself. i'm just praying everything goes well. i've already driven by myself and sometimes i forget to check my speed and i end up going 20 km over the speed limit. i don't mean to i just forget sometimes to look and see... i was concentrating on the other drivers on the road. particularly the guy who was riding on my butt for a while. when we came to a stop light i looked in my rear-view mirror and the guy was just yaking away... the girl seemed like she was upset or that she just didn't care what the heck he was saying. i tried to tell him to shut up but thats kind of hard when you're confined to the car in front of them. anywho i felt really bad for that girl and i hated that guy for being so close to my rear end! well today is the first day back at school after a very non-productive spring break. ya i cleaned out my room amazingly well but thats about all i did for the entire two weeks. i am so lazy... sometimes i wish i wasn't this lazy but you know what?? i think i really just needed to rest this spring break anyways. the rest did me lots of good. anyways i'm pretty sure i could've slept in later since i am driving myself to school but i like to stick to my routine. now i might be sitting around for a while waiting until i actually have to leave. Adios amigos!

WOOHOO!!!!!!!!!!

just thought i'd express my pure joy of the fact that i passed!!! meaning i am now an "N" driver. no more Loser driver for me!! now i'm a Nerd. it's so exciting!! i get to drive by myself for the first time tomorrow... ah! kind of scary but i think i'll manage. my parents are also gone to Mexico all next week so i get to use my moms car. altho only too and from school basically but still so exciting!! WOOHOO!!!!!!!

Life...

i really don't know what to say right now i just felt like writing a blog entry. life is crazy and it throws things at you. i hate it when it throws things. life is so complicated i've never really quite figured out the whole purpose. right now my purpose is graduate from high school. i have a really sick feeling in my stomach that i can't get out. i want to eat food but i can't. i went to the dentist today too... not fun... my dentist is kind of intimidating. then i went to shoppers drugmart!! its a great place and i bought stuff. it made me feel somewhat better. i actually ate dinner tho so now my stomach is almost back to normal. well it ought to be time i hit the hay. goodnight blog readers and fellow bloggers!

YC!!!

well i'm back from youth conference and... it was freakin amazing!! by far this YC and the very first YC i went to have been the best out of all of them. i am so thankful to have been a part of this whole experience and i'm so glad that i have God in my life. here are some pictures from an awesome weekend in calgary, alberta.

This is the worship band at YC... they were so awesome!!

heres a small group of people from our group.

Nick's eye got really red for some reason and he wanted me to take a picture of it.

Kyle and Danielle (some people thought it was fun to call her DaniellA... she did not appreciate it) this is the happy couple!


me with my "brother" Dylan!!

Why am I awake at 4am??

so i'm awake... i woke up a little too early and i don't have much to do. therefore i'm writing down my thoughts for my blog. i am up at 4am b/c i'm going to youth conference in calgary!! i'm really excited... i had trouble sleeping but i did get at least 5 hours of sleep in b/4 i had to wake up. well after this weekend i'm going to need a lot of sleep. good thing i have 2 weeks of spring break instead of just one. so its 4am... i think i'll go make myself a hot chocolate!

IKEA!!

yesterday my sis and i went to Ikea!! it was so much fun!! i loved it! it was the first time that i had actually spent a lot of money at ikea and it felt so great. i'm so excited to put up the pictures i bought... they r so pretty and now that my room is clean it's going to look amazing! well that's my excitement for now.